Take me from the past of all my mistakes to where the future lies

Saturday, September 30, 2006 01:35

im dead bored.
one minute im on da phone, one minute im watchin tv.

wa n me had this dirty little secret!!!
huahuahua..
winkies**
ade ade je au ko ni.. hmm..

few minutes ago, i had ranjit on my doorstep.
wif e delivery i've ordered.
i enjoy my werking days wif him.
funny n juz funny la..

my dad is meeting todae.
n yeah, wif e money n stuffs..
i've already planned e colour n
e type of traditional costume fer this yr..

tmr, ders combined practise again.
n im off to sumwer wif whu else cept fer my beloved ayg.
everyone is gonna b der tmr,
SO my sickness of missing u darls n dudus will cure tmr.

sue gf, wir gf , haz gf , bedahkuz*, kynn n elly darl
n whoeva names i've yet to list down here..
i cant wait fer tmr..
seriously..
rindu banget sama kamu sihh..

to my dearest syg, HAZ Gf..
happy 18th bdAe to u dearest.
may ur days be blessed wif happiness n joy
as long as u live.
remember dat u haf ur loved ones around u..
haf fun.. n let e past b ur sweetest memories ever ok.
smile always darling..

to wir n elly gf,
im happy fer u...
n smile always k..
nanti kiter pi double date aite?..
cant wait..

to mamat
tk aleh2 ko kol aku..
ape crite beb?
n ya, dos tyms were funny n great huh?..
i still remember..
but all of us haf moved on..
but it seems weird la,
camne eh ko leh ade no. uma aku?

Friday, September 29, 2006 05:03

niqita aria..
i missed her loudness.
i missed her hyper-ness.
i missed her cuteness.
i missed her smartness.
i missed her.

geramnye!!!
mcm nk gigit jek..
soon, i'll be carrying u in my arms again..

fight fight fights!!!
i hate it.
urghh..

Monday, September 25, 2006 14:11

omfg!!
i cant believe this BUt im werking la ehh..
wadeva it is, my first day was ok.
things went smoothly..

wa had to leave at 5..
the other staffs are frenly.
peak hours sux!!!
i am already blur n things like dat
makes me more n more dumb n blur..
kimmekk..
aku yg stress..

boss send us home lar ehh.
mane mau dapat ni mcm nye keje?
save duit transport aku..
winkies**

1st day of ramadhan..
n i succeed!!
i manage to overcome my nafsu "makan"..
tho it sux la wif my fever n flu..
hopefully, in this ramadhan month,
it juz bring calmness to me..
i juz need to be myself..

i damnn fucking hate it wen pple pin point me.
pala buto la..
aku nk happy pun tk boleh pe..
ade je ko nk tuduh2..
ade je nak membebel..
kimmek, pk aku suke pe..
camane aku tk stress..
benda kecik pun nk besar2 kan..
aku tk faham ar!!

Saturday, September 23, 2006 14:48

dammit!!
im havin fever n flu..
i hate bein sick..
it juz pissed me off!!!'
my head are as heavy..
wad makes it come back?
goshh!!! they're such irritating pests to me..
urghhhh!!!

i've never did dat kinda thing b4.
but i did it fer u.
n it wasn't even intentional..
so dun dare say i didnt okayy..
as much as u've been missing me..
i miss u as much as u do, only more..

00:02

ramadhan has yet to come.
in a few days tym..
nO!! it's like tmr..
cant wait..

niat kat hati tu nak puase full la this yr..
insyaallah, lau tkde halangan ye..
i juz hafta train myself starting from now..
hmm..

jap agi nk pi interview.
boring la pat uma nie..
tkde pape pun.
lau kua pun, ti duit abis.
i noe my ayg is insecure n scared if i started to work..
BUT u hafta trust me ayg.
in my eyes, all i see is u..
and u've captured e key to my heart..<<3

Come on baby we aint gonna live forever
Let me show you all the things that we could do
You know you wanna be together
And I wanna spend the night with you

Friday, September 22, 2006 12:32

wen a gurl was away fer awhile..
her mum tot she went missing.
and der she goes asking e gurl's dearest..
which also makes him worried n asked those closest to her.
feeling of relief overcomes everyone wen e gurl was back home, safe n sound.

she was so sorrie if she got everyone worried.
she didnt noe it'll turn out this way though.
poor gurl.
on behalf of her beloved dearest, she's saying sorie..

im bored seyy..
too many problems, too many secrets..
but too little spaces in my head..
at tyms, i juz dun wanna noe..
at tyms, i juz feel like i cant take it anymore.
but, i hafta hold on..
and be strong..

Thursday, September 21, 2006 13:26

"dat was sumthing!!!" she said.
but all is kept secret.

"dat was pretty awesome!!
n CUTE kan?" she added.

hmm..
dat makes her think damm far..
sumthin dat will make her sit n ponder..
n so she smile wickedly to herself.

ps: i wan dat dress la!!
mai, fridae cmfrmm ke?

Wednesday, September 20, 2006 09:03

im home ALONE again.
urghh!!!..

i juz hated to be home ALONE.
it juz sux la.
so my daily routine are:

wake up
clean my bed
clean myself
watch tv(i dun favour it actually)
open e fridge
get sumthing to munch on
movie marathon(repeated-ly)
off e tv
kemas e rumah(if things were not in place)
rest fer a while
went into my room
hug my elmo
on my radio
brangan skejap
off my radio n on my desktop
surf e net(practically i find it boring)
i dun actuallie like msn-ing
(i usuallie appear offline or i put myself as away)
BUT pple juz dun understand e meaning of "AWAY"
den i off my comp
waited fer my ayg to msg or call me
went into e kitchen AGAIN
cooked a mini meal fer myself(gud thing i noe how to cook.heh)
enjoy e food
back to movie marathon-ing AGAIN
till i get bored, then i'll be off to sleep.

boring kan?
haiz..

if i were to b out,
one thing, i'll finished up my money in juz a day.
and dat practically sux.

if i have a list of fren of whom i'd wanted to b out wif..
i noe der will b a bunch of em.

1st of all my 2 dearest sis i've always missed.
2nd my INk darls
3rd my dearest b!!!(aku rindu ko giler babs siooott!!!)
4th wirna n e drama peeps
5th my E.i dudus n gurlies
6th ezah honey
7th pqah darl
8th ...
9th ...

ders juz so many of em but TOO little tym.
ever since i was hospitalized, i missed so many days.
days outing wif em.
but i undastand their bz ryt now.
all i can do here is miss em as much as i can.
if only everyone is doin e same thing,
i guess dat wud be way more easier.

so here i am.
blogging away.
i've cooked myself nasi goreng todae(tk tau sedap ke tak)
still, i haf to fill my empty stomach wif sumthing..
haiz..

can sumone juz tell tell wat to do..

btw, todae's my result!!
hopefully i did well fer my exams(tho i noe i dun)
i am nervous.
coz if i fail, i hafta take supp paper(if haf)
n dat means i hafta study n memorize n wadeva again n again.
dat sUX!!!
so im hoping fer a D atleast. rather den i fail.
life is so..
nvm.

ayg dearest..
i miss u already..
haizz

Tuesday, September 19, 2006 14:08

ok..
im home ..

well.. its been so long since i last touched my desktop huh?
i miss u lar ok..
well, been tru lots lately..

i can see dat my mum, dad n step family reallie were concern abt me.
well, e feeling of wanting to b hospitalized
was not as fun as i thought it wud be.
it juz sux.
i think i was such a nuisance to em..
too bad..
i paid fer it..
worst is dat e doc dunch even noe e sickness im havin..
they seem blurr..
haiz..
i was "nil by mouth" lar ehh..
shittness seyy..
cant eat fer like 29 hours straight!!!
lapar lar ok!!!
bodoh pe org suruh aku tk makan..
n they insert like about 10-13 packets of sodium chlorine,
wadeva they call it..
into my arm..
but, one of e doctor is cute la..
mcm slenger2 cute gitu..

and to those whu had been der fer me all e tym,
im sincerely appreciated it loadss..
especially to sue n wirna Gfs..
ur care n concern reallie touched my heart..

to those whu were there..
haz, sue, kynn, wawa, mai, wir, ameer, dhil, abang, afiq, marni,n e bfs..
i appreciate ur appearance..
though it was fer a awhile,
it reallie makes my dae..
u noe, wif those nurses n doctors n medicine
n e thing stuck to my arm n e fact dat i can even lie down straight..
haiz.. thanx!!

to ayul n wan..
u came, eventhough u finished skool at 6++..
thanx.. sorie if i kacau u in front of my parents lar ehh..
winkies**

to anwar!!!
hahahah..
surprised dat u came la..
thanx la ok?..
dun haf to get me anything la k..
save ur money..

to myra n bedahkuz
thanx fer e concern n stuff.
i knew ur bz werking..
dun worry, im fine here..
n i'll be ok in a few days tym.
i juz hope dat..
we'll met up soon..
coz i seriously misses u badly!!!

to ayg dearest..
i appreciate ur sacrifices all these while.
thanx ayg..
from der, i can reallie see how deep ur love is fer me..
and i lurve u too..
im sorie if i ever hurt u all this while..
i truly am..
miss e presence of u being wif me..
wif both my mum n cuzins n family..

i miss my anak sdare already la..
geramnye!!!!

puase has yet to come..
ayg.. u noe i noe la ok?
heheheh..

Thursday, September 07, 2006 14:55

im dead bored lar kan..
but i sumhow find this funny..
so i think i'll share..

10:53

soon, i think my room's turning into e sesame street's studio..
haahahahaha..
siao.
wadeva.
i still think dat their cute little cuddly soft toys..

e elephant.
ayg's favourite lar!!
hahaha. kidding!!

cookie monster.

elmo.
cute kan dier.
my 2nd fave.

oscar!!!!
my favourite lar!!!
but, e soft toys cant be found lar.

soon, i think i'll have all of em in my room..
as a collection..

10:47

dream vespA?

oldskool vespa

i kinda loike this one.
white.. i loike!!

this one is not dat bad huH?

this is still my fave of all..
vintage scooter!!

dreaming of a car??

my dream car.

ayg's dream car.

09:38

im bored to death..
went looking fer job interview wif wawa darl juz now..
had fun wif u lar babe..
since both of us tgh tkde duit nie..
hahah..
kekek lar gerl..

e 3 musketeers (hakim, rizal n hafid)
insist of wanting me to meet them fer awhile.
n i was in a state of shock lar ehh wen i see em.
they hand me this big gigantic plastic bag n say they gotta go.
terperanjat gegerl seyy..
wow!! im so touched..
reallie didnt expect anything frm em la.
slamer ni pun aku main2 je sey..
aiyoyoyoyo..
wat surprised me is dat..
nvm, let me juz kip it to myself.
seriously, thanx guys!!!
lau aku free nanti aku masakkan korang lafi la ehh..
tapi tk janji au..

lepak wif wawa darl fer awhile..
den i headed home.
ngantok la kan..
haizz..

bored!!!

Wednesday, September 06, 2006 16:11

feeling of excitement overcomes me todae..
afta all e convos we had yest.
n all e hard tyms we've been tru.
im reallie sorie.
i never wanted it to happened, but it juz did..

missing my b* already..
biler nk kua nie?

hot news!!!
sumones attached!!
yeah, 2 of my gud frens are..
im happy fer both of u.
n i wish u all e best okayy.
im always here if ya need a listening ear.

had a date wif my dearest ayg todae.
i smile seeing him upon my doorstep.
him wif my fave "SWEET SECRETS" cake..
awww... heart him to pieces lar ehh..
matair aku satu tu..
went to town..
had our lunch at Fish n Co.
i simply lurve my i-dunno-wat-drink
and ayg lurve his cola tonic..
nk minum pun leh gadoh nie..
den we went window shopping ..
saw this lovely dress!!!!
bUt it cost 59.90
mahal lar ehh,..
if only i can juz snap my finger n money appear..
dat wud be "WOW"
i could simply get anything i want in split seconds..
but dat is fantasy..
haha..

went city link n had Gelare as our dessert!
haha..
i lurve my mango sorbet lar ehh!!!
like MANGO! MANGO! MANGO!
one of my fave fruits too..
we had fun todae..
hahah..

i lorve u ayg!!
i juz do..
thanks fer everything..
cant wait fer e nxt n next celebrations wif u..

16:01

wee..
here are e pics!!!

mine n his!!

looks delicious kan?
tempting seyy..

after 45 minutes..

dessert!! green tea and mango sorbet!!!
and mango citrus smoothie..

he lurve his hairdo in this pichur..

i lurve him n he lurves me.
we knew it long tym ago..

again**

ayg!!!
happy 4th mnth ANniVersaRy!!!!
ur always loved by me..
ur someone whu definitely stole my heart away..
i lurve u..<33

Tuesday, September 05, 2006 14:54

more pics!!!

14:50

pics taken on mondae wif missy massy..

weewittt

00:12

happy belated birthday babe. (=
cheers to our unusual friendship. haha.

it funny how i found dya. it was thanks to a few parties actually. namely, my kentot aisha, afiq i, ema and nurul.

once upon a time, i had this small misunderstanding btwn me and ema and nurul. and at that very point i liked afiq. this adds to that and i found myself on msn till 6am chatting with dya with the help of aisha. i thought she disliked me cos i was "with" afiq. and she thought i disliked her cos she was kinda close to him. but we ended up laughing ourselves silly and i found a friend in her, someone i could lean back on cos i was "fighting" with nurul and ems. and we had this uncanny resemblance. scary, yes? haha.

i love you dya. no matter how short our meet ups are, i'm glad you are my friend. and my one and only twin! hugs.

copied n paste from darl ain's bloggie
OMG!!!
like dat post reallie touched my heart..
SWEEt gF!! i lurve u too..
n im glad dat u were in my life, few mnths ago, now n will always be!!!
my one n only twinnies!!!
argghhhh!!!! mcm nk peluk ko je au skrg..
reallie, THANX loads!!

Monday, September 04, 2006 12:06

woke up early in da morning.
went cc to meet up wif e rest.
reached siglap south about 10am.
watched e competition..
but i didnt stay fer piala tun sri lanang.
e BK guys get 3rd position.
e look on their face shows disapointment.
its ok la.. ni kan ur first comp.
u'll be better fer e nxt one fer sure..

went out wif my ayg afta dat.
saw my dearest bestest gf!!
miss u lar gf..
bile nk lepak uma aku?
aku on holidae au babe..
hehe..

ayg insist to get me a bdae gift.
he aske dme to choose which one wud i prefer?
cookie monster or elmo?
different is dat:
ELMO - is cute, my fave, BUT e part fer me to hug is small
n e legs n arms are dangling like sotong..

COOKIE MONSTER - nicer to hug, BUT i dun actuallie favour it.

and so..
i've made my decision then..
i choose e one in green..
as usual. HEh!!
my one n only ayangkuz**

it doesn't seem ryt.
i hate it.
im reallie sorie.
it shudden b dis way.

Sunday, September 03, 2006 14:38

suppose to meet ain n aisha todae.
but i hafta wait fer my grandma to reachnly i cant go out.
and so my nenek came later den i ot.

hafta meet wawa to pass e costumes n stuff.
went cc fer awhile.
see e dk guys practise fer their upcoming comp,
which is this SUNDAY!!!
i hope u guys are reallie prepared.
all e best to u guys.
i knew after all e hardwork n trainings..
u guys should b able to bring home e trophy..
hopefully~~

stayed at wawa's crib yest.
sine we hafta be in skool by 7.30am.
knowing der wont b enuf tym fer us to get ready,
everyone agreed to have a sleepover at wawa's house!!
excited seyy..

brought vcds,
bought some crackers,
soft drinks,
maggi mee,
n orders kfc instead of our 1st tot of ordering pizza.
first to come is me n kynn ourselves..
followed by fyza then bedahkuz lastly haz.
we even had our few last practices der..
its fun though to haf this kinda thing once in a while..
i was e crazy one down der, as per normal.
kept talkin to this soft toy tortoise.
cant help it, but its cute la.
geran au..
k wadeva.
me kynn wa n fyza were e one not sleeping
while haz n bedahkuz had already gone to lala land..

went Bishan Park to performed e dance..
i duno y but i wasnt feeling well.
n i didnt dance dat well.
i was ok at first, i did smil.
not until, ders tis part wen sumthing struck me.
i cant even force myself to smile..
urghh!!!
sorie wawa..
='<

went back to wawa's house since our stuffs are der.
had a short nap.
e pain lessened..
i tot i was already ok..
but not until, e pain came back.
it was atrociously unbearable.
mcm nk pecahkan perut aku pun ade seyy..
but, i hafta tahan.

told ayg i wanted to go home,
he he insist to stay few a while more.
kong asam btol..
neither did i noe dat they had planned a surprise fer me.
wen i open my eyes, i saw a cake.
especially fer me.
n i didnt noe dat kynn darl actuallie
asked her aunt to bake it fer me..
e cake was delicious, like reallie delicious lar ehh..
i tot it was bought from a shop..
but it wasn't.
THANX a million darls!!!
i lurve u.
each n single one of u..